Just Breathe
by SonjaTaylor
Summary: "You know what to do when you're afraid?" Upset from having to move in with his father, young Rufus Shinra is comforted by Tseng. Rufus uses the advice he was given all throughout his life...most importantly during an explosion.


This story was inspired by this image found here #/art/Breathe-174209836?hf=1, which is also the cover of this story. I reserve all rights to the artist.

Just Breathe

Eight year old Rufus pressed his forehead against the window of the helicopter, watching the city of Midgar pass below him. Hundreds of thousands of lights lit up the city, casting a daylight glow over the night scene.

_Midgar…_

His new home.

Midgar was much bigger than what his mother had described…and scarier. Green smoke billowed out of formidable reactors like volcanoes, casting an eerie radiance over every detail of the city. Metal covered all of the structures, and robots patrolled the numberless streets below, guarding this large prison he would call home.

_My father is the ruler of this place?_

_It's horrible._

He remembered the words he had overheard his father telling his mother over the phone: _"I want my son to grow up in Midgar. He is my heir. He needs to learn how to rule this place when I am gone. Just make sure he looks polished and professional when he arrives. I don't want a bad name because of him. My son must learn to be perfect in every way."_

Rufus didn't want to leave his mother or his home, and move into the city. He had never met his father before, but now, all of a sudden, his father wanted him.

Why?

And why take him away from all that he loved and was secure with?

_I don't care about perfection._

_Or this city._

_Or you._

Water splattered against the window, and streaked down the pane.

Rain?

Rufus blinked his eyes a few times.

No. That wasn't rain. Just his own tears.

"Rufus?

He started back from the window sill. A man stood behind him, stiff and unaffected by the swaying of the helicopter. His black suit gave him a stark and unfeeling appearance, as though he had no soul.

"We'll be landing soon," He explained.

This was the man who had come to take him away from his mother. He'd been given orders by the President to escort Rufus to Midgar, and Turks always carried out every mission. He had called himself Tseng.

Rufus only looked away, fixing his gaze once more out of the window.

_You…_

_It's your fault I'm here._

_You didn't have to follow orders._

A sob caught in Rufus's throat and tears streamed down his cheeks.

_I don't want to be here!_

Midgar wasn't a home. It would never be home. It was cold and dark and lifeless, full of people with no souls. It was a prison.

The boy clamped a hand over his face to block out every detail of this dark formidable world he would call home. Just maybe it would all disappear. He tried to staunch his tears, but they just poured through his fingers.

"Rufus…"

Rufus felt a gentle hand descend on his arm. He stared through the gaps of his fingers to see Tseng kneeling before him, compassion softening his hardened face.

"You know what to do when you're afraid?" The man asked him, gently.

Rufus shook his head, unable to speak.

"_Breathe_," Tseng explained. "Your body cannot function without breath. When a roof collapsed on me a few years ago, my chief saved my life. You know how? He told me to keep breathing, steadily, so that my body and mind could relax. As long as I was breathing, I would live."

Tseng reached up and took Rufus's small hand in his own. Carefully he pulled it from his tear-streaked face and set it at his side. Then, just as gently, he placed his hand at the boy's cheek and brushed aside his tears. "So remember, when you're afraid or hurt…just breathe."

Rufus stared out of a large window in the President's personal room in the Shinra building. Several years had passed since he had first arrived in Midgar. How long ago it felt now. So much had changed.

He, Rufus Shinra, was no longer the weak and fearful shadow of his father. Now, he, Rufus Shinra, was President of Midgar.

He smirked at his reflection in the polished glass, tinted green by the Mako reactors surrounding the building. His father was no longer here to oppress and control him. Every being in Shinra now bowed to _his_ will. Even the city had become like a home now. It no longer looked like a large metal prison, but a place of wealth and power.

A tremor shot through the floor at his feet, interrupting his thoughts. Light exploded before his vision, and the window shattered. Rufus staggered backwards, shielding his eyes as glass fragments pelted his body like rain. Flames ignited around him, fire crawling up the walls and eating away the supports. The roof above him snapped and came crumbling down. Gasping, he tore away, but the room collapsed upon him.

Darkness swallowed Rufus's world. Stone dug into his skin as debris piled overtop of him, pressing on his chest and compressing his lungs. He could hardly breath. Pain radiated all over his body like fire

He couldn't move. His body felt completely pinned and broken-broken just like his glorious Midgar.

_No! Shinra was mine._

_After all I've done…is this my reward?_

_A pile of rubble?_

His eyes burned. He sealed them shut as blood trailed down from his forehead, threatening to trickle into his eyes.

Everything about his life had fallen perfectly into place…until _this_. He had just gained control of the company in his father's stead, he had the army under his thumb, and the Turks were nothing more than puppets in his hands.

But had he gone wrong somewhere?

"_Rufus…"_

Tseng's voice.

He opened one eye, but saw nothing but darkness. The voice was just a memory. Nothing real.

"_You know what to do when you're afraid?" _

Those words. He had never forgotten them. During every business meeting with a foe or council member alike, he never met with them until he had practiced and regulated his breathing. This practice gave him the confidence and collectiveness everyone knew him for.

But he had forgotten the most important part about that time those years ago. He had forgotten about Tseng and the kindness that the Turk had shown to him.

Under his father's influence, Rufus had come to see the Turks as nothing more than robots to program and control as he needed. They were machines without souls, able to dispose of his enemies or cover up mistakes that would harm his own image or that of the company's.

But were the Turks truly emotionless killers-people without souls? Wasn't Tseng the one who got on his knees to comfort him those years ago when Rufus was afraid to meet his father?

_Maybe…_

I'm_ the one without a soul._

Something wet streaked down his dusty cheeks. It wasn't sticky like blood.

Tears?

_No, it can't be._

_Why am I…crying?_

He hadn't cried ever since that day he had first been brought to Shinra. He had earned the reputation of a man who had never bled or cried. And now, he was doing both.

The sound of something metal striking stone vibrated across his skull, and pain raced through his shoulder. The sound struck again and again. Another sound filtered through the rubble.

"Boss, I can't find him! It'll take a lifetime to dig through this mess!"

…_A voice?_

"Reno, you heard Boss's orders. Dig."

"Right, right…"

_Reno and Rude._

The Turks were looking for him. They sounded close. They'd get him out of here.

Pressure lifted off of his side as part of the rubble was thrown aside. Light beat across his face, but he didn't dare open his eyes.

"Boss!" Reno's voice pierced through the destruction, "we've got him! But he's, uhhh…not exactly in prime shape."

Rufus gradually felt the rest of the pressure lift from his body as the rubble was torn aside. With what little strength he had left, he clamped his hand over his face. He couldn't let the Turks see the damage that had scarred his perfection. He couldn't let them see his tears.

A pair of strong hands lifted him from the rubble, propping his back against something solid. Another set of arms wrapped around him, and a feminine voice sounded close to his ear, "He's alive! What a relief! Tseng, T-tseng, he's bleeding!"

"Boss, he might not live through this one." Reno's voice quivered.

A set of footsteps approached across the rubble, and then a steady voice, calm, but commanding, "Reno, Rude, Elena, stand aside."

Rufus felt the hands release him and heard the Turks back away. Moments later, he felt a gentle hand descend on his arm.

"Rufus…"

It was quiet, but strong.

_Rufus…_

Not President.

"Rufus…"

His boy name.

"…breathe."

Tseng reached up and grabbed Rufus's hand, gently prying his fingers away from his face.

Rufus grimaced in resistance, but allowed the Turk to place his hand at his side. Tseng

then reached up and brushed away Rufus's tears.

"There," Tseng whispered. "Now breathe."

Rufus opened his eyes to look at Tseng. A tender smile was on the man's face.

_Breathe…_

"_Your body cannot function without breath. When a roof collapsed on me a few years ago, my chief saved my life. You know how? He told me to keep breathing, steadily, so that my body and mind could relax. As long as I was breathing, I would live."_

Rufus sucked in air, and then let out a deep exhale.

He could still breathe.

He would live.


End file.
